Beside You
by NYPDliz
Summary: My first shot at publishing an SVU Fic! Olivia and Rafael have developed a close friendship since they started working together. What becomes of their relationship when something inexplicably awful happens. Starts during season 15's Beast's Obsession. Rated M for future chapters.


This story starts during season 15's Beast's Obsession, and then takes on a life of it's own!

I am warning you in advance, this story will get dark before it gets better. Very dark. rape triggers, violence... If that's not your thing, you might want to skip this one. For the rest of you, I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I do writing it. I've had this idea in my head for months and have had the first chapter written down for about as long, and I've finally decided to go ahead and see what you think. Please review, with the good (and the bad), because reviews make me happy! (or at least they did years ago which is when I last published a story on here!)

I have the entire story planned out in my head and have a few chapters written already, so I will try to update at least weekly!

So, without further ado, I don't own anything, Cragen is still squad Captain, and here is the story!

He couldn't get it out of his head. It was on replay, flooding his every waking moment. Olivia, screaming for it to stop, begging him to not do this as tears streamed down her face and blood trickled down her body. And the "what ifs" were eating him alive. What if he'd called Cragen, what if he hadn't gone in alone, what if he'd brought a weapon, or said something different or even not gone at all? But it didn't matter now, it was too late.

Things were never going to be the same and there was no going back. Not this time.

*******24 hours before******

She'd put herself in this situation. She had no right to feel sorry for herself. For the second time in one month shy of a year, she was being held hostage by William Lewis. The first time was completely unexpected. This time, she walked right into his trap. She was so gullible for believing he would just hand Amelia over to her and go on his merry way.

And now, with one hand cuffed to a metal table, she'd told him to rape her and spare Amelia... at least for the time being. She, however, would not fight him, he'd find that too pleasurable. This of course, meant he got bored after approximately 10 seconds and moved on to his next idea, a game of Russian roulette, with a second gun he'd brought along.

"Ladies first." He said as he passed the pistol over to her, keeping his other weapon fixed on her.

Having been a cop for two decades meant Olivia Benson didn't scare easily. But this was different from anything she'd ever had to go through. The thought of ending her life at her own hands in front of a little girl, being left for dead for her squad to find, was more than she could handle. She could no longer hide the terror she felt; she was shaking, trembling finger on the trigger, trying desperately to find a way out of this, but Lewis could see right through her.

"And if you think you can shoot at me with that, just remember there's five empty chambers, one bullet. So either you get extremely lucky or you pull the trigger, I shoot you and it's just me and Amelia."

There was no way out. She had to do this, if not for herself then for the little girl who had been at the wrong place at the wrong time and was trusting Olivia to get her out of this situation. She put the gun to her temple, pulled the trigger and relief flooded her as she heard nothing but a click. She opened her eyes to find Lewis grinning as he spoke once more.

"Olivia, I'm so glad you're still with us, aren't you? I have so much more in store for us before we part ways, so let's try something else, and not push our luck." And that ended the game of Russian roulette. Olivia wasn't sure whether to be relieved that Lewis once again had so easily given up on his latest entertainment, because whatever was coming next would most likely be far worse for her or Amelia.

"So, new game. You know what would liven up this little shindig we have going on?" Olivia had decided her best course of action was to ignore him, so he went on.

"I think we need more guests. You're not as much fun as I remember, and little Amelia, well; I think she's already paid enough. And let's face it, she really didn't have anything to do with this. Now, let me think. Who could make this more interesting... Detective Rollins seems like quite the party girl, but, she's not really my type. No, you know what? Let's think outside the box shall we? Ooooooh I know! How about that old partner of yours? I'm a sucker for romance, did you know that about me Olivia? I can see it now, you confessing your everlasting love for him right here in this granary. I could light a few candles to set the scene for you, film the whole thing so you'd have a nice memento."

The thought of him getting Elliot involved in this made her stomach churn. She hadn't seen her ex partner in 3 years and definitely didn't want this setting to be where she first lay eyes on him after his absence. But she offered no reaction, she wouldn't give him the satisfaction.

"Wait, what am I thinking, I'm sure he called you after seeing you on the news, brought you flowers or a casserole when you got home right sunshine?" She felt as if she'd gotten punched in the gut with his words, but that's exactly what he wanted, to see her break, so she didn't budge.

"So yeah, that's kind of boring then, and if I remember correctly you said he could kick my ass, so maybe I need to rethink this." And then his eyes lit up once more.

"That lawyer friend of yours, with the holier-than-thou attitude and the laughable sense of style."

Once again she spoke no words, but a pang of fear hit her at imagining Barba in this situation with her. He wasn't like her, he wasn't a cop. He was a master of words in the courtroom, and that's how he fought his battles. Not with guns and violence. Getting involved in a crisis like this was way beyond the scope of his expertise. She was already worried sick over Amelia being here with her, she didn't need to be worrying about Barba as well.

But Lewis went on excitedly. "You know the one, he sent me to prison! Though I have to say, I don't think he did a very good job for someone who spent the better part of a decade at Harvard studying to master the art of prosecution. I could have been a great lawyer, you know, if things had been different." He was rambling, and Olivia was praying that he would forget all about his new plan.

"I'm a natural, which I'm sure you saw at the trial. People would pay good money to have me represent them. But enough about me. Let's call him shall we? After all, it's thanks to him that we had so much fun together the first time, after he was so incompetent in court; I think I should show him my gratitude personally."

He fumbled through the contents of his pocket and produced a cell phone he'd stolen along the way, and slid it across the table to her.

Olivia and Rafael had gotten close after the trial, and even more so after Brian left. She had considered him a friend even before then, but he'd been her rock through it all, and the more time she spent with him the more she realized how alike they were. Difficult childhoods and abandonment issues made them more private than most. This meant they both respected boundaries and knew to avoid sore subjects. She enjoyed his company and the easy banter that was always going on between them. And in this moment she regretted the friendship, because she knew if she made the call to him, he would come running to her rescue and walk right in to the same trap she had just a few hours ago.

"Lewis, three is already a crowd. Do you really want someone else here?" She knew it was pointless. He was the master of mind games, and he clearly had the upper hand, but she had to try.

"Dial, Olivia. Or I will get mad, and you don't want to make me mad, do you sunshine? I might take it out on little Amelia here." With those words, he gently stroked the little girls' hair.

Damn him for having so much leverage.

She picked up the phone with the hand free of the handcuffs, and dialed the familiar number.

"Tell him to come alone, or to bring two body bags that he'll have to fill himself with yours and Amelia's bodies if he's thinking of trying something stupid."


End file.
